How to Achieve Your Goals by Considering the Consequences

Everything that we do in life involves consequences. There is a great quote that says, "You are free to choose, but you are not free from the consequences". The same can be said for the consequences behind not doing daily activities that move you closer to achieving your goals.

The obvious consequence is that the goal won't happen; however, for some people that is not enough to get them moving. And if that is you, that's okay. There is more that you can do.

Tony Robbins always says that anything we do, or seek, in life is a method for avoiding pain and increasing pleasure. With that being said, the consequences of you not achieving a certain goal can become a lot more serious when you think of the pain it could cause yourself and those around you.

Let's take the example of a woman who needs to lose a good deal of weight as prescribed by her doctor. She puts it off because she doesn't enjoy working out, and she loves food. She has a vacation to Disney World coming up. She has two little girls age 7 and 9, but mom can't ride any of the rides with them because she can't fit in the seats. In addition, mom chooses not to go in the pool with them because she doesn't feel like putting on a swimsuit. The family vacation that the girls were looking forward to is now greatly reduced in meaning and fun because the mother could not take the actions necessary to better herself. Her inaction has caused pain not only for herself by constantly being denied the ability to ride the rides, but by seeing the look on her girls faces. There's a little bit of embarrassment there, resentment, regret. The girls aren't having fun because mom can't join in and they are jealous of the kids around them that have parents playing with them.

As you can see, that example is full of a lot of pain. The consequence is not just, "If I don't watch what I eat I will not lose weight or become more healthy". Now the consequence behind the inaction takes on a much more serious role that dives into the emotions of not just the person not taking the action, but all of those around her.

This is what you need to think of when you consider inaction towards a goal you have. Not just what is the obvious consequence if it doesn't happen, but how does that affect those around you. How does that make you feel? How does that make them feel? How does lack of completion push you forward?  After you have permitted yourself to explore those emotions, turn them around. Think of what happens when you DO achieve your goal. How will that make you feel? How will that make those around you feel? What can you provide them with now that you have accomplished what you set out to do? What can you now push yourself to do that you couldn't do before? Take those emotions, and run with them.

How to Achieve Success through Reverse Engineering

When I share my vision board for a new year in January to my social media audience, it is most commonly met with cheers of support from my friends. I mean, that's only natural right? You always want to support your friends and their goals. What surprises people the most, however, is when I post the vision board again at the end of the year showing what I had accomplished, and what still is left to be taken care of.

The difference between goal attainment and dreams is action taken on part of the individual. You can plan for hours, days, or even months on how you are going to develop a life that you feel that you deserve, but it will never amount to anything or go anywhere without action by YOU.

So how do I achieve everything I set out to do? I plan and I permit myself to have some fun in the meantime.

Life doesn't have to be so serious all the time, that's why my vision boards always contain business strategic goals, and fun little goals for myself.  But regardless if it's a business goal, a personal goal, or just a fun goal that you have set for yourself you need to plan.

The first step is writing down exactly what it is that you want.  What do YOU want? I'm not asking what other people want FOR you, I'm asking you what you want. This is not a list you have to show others, you can keep it to yourself. But get honest about it.

The second step is putting a date on it. When do YOU want it by? Now, some people will say go way outside of your comfort zone with this, but this is a step that I usually spend the most time on because I want my goals to be challenging, but not so much so that they seem impossible. When creating a goal, think about what you have now, what you will have in the future, and the amount of time you have to work on achieving it.  Most importantly, and this can be hard, but how much heart do you have behind it, because that is going to determine a lot of what you are willing to sacrifice to get there.

The third step is to write down everything you can think of that is needed to achieve that goal. This is called reverse engineering and is a step that is most often skipped, but one of THE MOST VALUABLE steps to take. This lays it all out for you. This gives you a clear picture of EXACTLY what you need to do. It is the rough draft of the story that you are about to create. After doing this, you might need to adjust your dates a little bit and that's okay, just make sure you are not laxing on yourself to the point where you will get lazy.

The final step: take action. Take massive action to make it happen. Take one goal at a time, look at it reverse engineered, and think of how you can take one step per day (or more) towards achieving those small items on the to do list of your goal. 

At first it's overwhelming, but practice makes perfect. Not to mention, every goal you mark off is a boost to your own self confidence, and your own belief in yourself which will push you further through life to achieve things you never thought possible.

3 Tips for Crushing an Overwhelming To Do List

When life hands you multiple tasks to do at once, what do you do? Do you run the other way? Do you put your nose to the grindstone and just “get it over with”? Or maybe you lock yourself in a closet and have a good cry (no judgment). We all handle stress differently, and this past week of my life really had me thinking about the way in which I manage mine.

 

My life is not simple. I work 50 hours a week at my regular job, do my coaching and other fitness training and meal planning with clients on average another 30 hours during the week, get my daily workouts in (or I would go insane), plus I am a full time graduate student. Life is anything but boring…but at the same time it can get very boring as a social life is limited.

 

This past week I let the stress get the best of me. I just freaked out, the brain went to a pile of mush, and rather than devising a plan of how to ease the situation – I shut down.   I just shut down, ignored anything that I had to do and did what most girls do best – I went shopping.

 

Now, here I am on a Sunday night when I could be relaxing trying to make sure that everything I had neglected the past week gets done so that I can start Monday fresh. Had I of just taken 10 minutes to organize my days, this would not be the case and I could be kicking back watching a DVRed episode of Real Housewives (so much better, right!?) 

Here are my tips to prioritizing your tasks, and knocking them out of the park:

 

Step 1: Write your shiz down. Anything you have to do during the day, write it down. I even like to write down weekly tasks that I must accomplish, and goals that I would like to achieve. I have a whiteboard in my office where these go and very morning I make sure I look and consider “Where am I with this?”

 

Step 2: Look for the ugliest, most boring one that you can find. What one do you want to put off the most? Do that first. Get it over with. It’s like a Band Aid…just rip it off.

 

Step 3: Physically cross things off of your list as you complete them. Believe it or not, this act releases feel good chemicals in your brain helping you to feel accomplished and a bit more excited about accomplishing the rest of your tasks on your list.

 

Hope this helps! It sure would have helped me to stick with my own advice last week, but you live and learn!

Want to see my life as it unfolds (along with all the craziness that goes along with it?) follow me on Instagram @Nik4213

Pep Talks with Myself

Nothing like a lovely 12-miler to end your day. I was contemplating doing this run BEFORE work and then came to my senses that a long run mixed with a boring day would surely equal sleeping on my desk and possibly being fired. SO! After work, it is!

But let's back up a little bit here. Why on earth am I running 12 miles? For fun? Heeelll no. A while ago I decided to sign up for the Pittsburgh Half Marathon (my second year doing it), and though the road has been rough, I must honor my commitment.

I mapped out a new course for my 12 today, since my 10 last week just bored me to tears. This one includes some hills, so hopefully the use of different muscle groups helps out my knees a bit. I think the regular pounding on the pavement mixed with the constant use of the SAME muscles doesn't do me much good...and the Half will include some hills anyway so I might as well make this run as realistic as I can.

You would think today WAS race day the way my nerves are. I think I am just nervous to see my end time. I need to keep an 11:23 mile pace in order to meet my goal time of dropping 10 minutes from last year (it's on my dream board...I HAVE to accomplish it lol) and sometimes I find myself going too fast out of the gate, but at times it's so hard to slow down! Finding a good pace is difficult for me...I'm much more of a "get it over with" kind of girl and that's probably where most of my problems lie.


I could have quit a while ago, especially when I was sick with a chest cold for three weeks. I could have said that my knees were hurting and for the sake of them, I should backoff running, or I could give in to my sometimes negative attitude during my runs and just throw in the towel. But I've gotta honor my commitment.

The route does look like it will be challenging, though. Challenging - but something different...so we will see how it goes. I will just be happy when this run is over (mainly because pizza awaits!) but also because then I start into my taper and my body really needs it. This training season has been difficult from getting sick multiple times to having this chest cold thing that likes to keep showing back up; the stress of work, school and moving; along with many other things. Now is especially difficult because with the move, because there is so much that I SHOULD be doing other than running, but what can ya do!

You don't give up. That's what you do. If you commit to a goal, you see it through. It doesn't matter how many times that goal tries to knock you down, you keep standing up until it is in your reach, and then you lunge until it is in your grasp..then you celebrate.
.I do think this might be my last Half for a bit. I say that now and I'm sure on race day I'll be looking for my next one to sign up for..that's how I found myself in this one, haha. I do have some fun runs to look forward to coming up between Color Me Rad and Ruckus, so that should keep me actively training throughout summer.


Once you get a goal in your mind, the only one stopping you from achieving it is yourself. If you work at it hard enough, you just might trick yourself into liking exactly what you say you hate doing (like running!) Would I sit here and confess my love for running? No! "I hate running!", yet I find myself continuously signing up for these darn races. Have I tricked myself into loving what I once hated?

Time to mentally prepare. Wish me luck!!

Sharing a gift with YOU!

Woohoo! It is an exciting day!

I am officially opening my 2013 health & fitness challenge groups today! Many of you are probably asking, "What the heck is a challenge group?" Well, I am here to tell you!

A challenge group is a small group of individuals who are dedicated to a common cause. In my case, the cause is health and fitness. My start came from a challenge group, and not only did I get great results during that time that I was in the group, but the results carried me on to new and exciting aspects of health and fitness.

A little about myself: I loved fast food. Loved it. I hated the way that I looked, though. I wasn't fat, but I was....puffy? Like, not fat but not toned, either. I would dabble around with workouts here and there. I got the gym memberships and would go and be a gym rat (see no results bc I didn't really have much knowledge at that time..just figured elipitcal and some weights here and there), did a ton of home fitness programs including Denise Austin, TaeBo, Carmen Electra...you name it, I probably have the DVD...but nothing ever really STUCK. I would always find myself hopping to the new trend, the new pill, the new WHATEVER and here I still sat...puffy and miserable.

My friend had asked me to join this accountability group and I figured, what the hell. It's January 2012..yet again, I'll try something new. This was a change! I got to be held accountable from my home office (no driving to meetings or embarrassing weigh ins), the accountability portion took me MAYBE 5 minutes out of my day, and these women were all so motivating and encouraging! There was no one watching me run in the mirror at the gym trying to be inconspicuous. There was no guy checking me out when all I wanted to do was work out. There were no time limits on machines, or now $39.95 each month for a gym membership that I stopped using. There was no driving to the gym after work, or on a Saturday morning. And there was no snarkiness from the members of the group.

This.Was. Awesome!

I was able to workout from home through a program that my coach recommended to me after I talked to her about my likes and dislikes..and what was great about that was that I actually enjoyed doing what I was doing. I wanted to pop in that day's DVD each and every day. And that kept me going. That mixed with the positivity from the group kept me going for ONCE in my life!!

Then I decided to do the same. I became a coach, and have been running fitness challenges throughout 2012 and gotten my challengers AMAZING results, and I take the challenge right along with you so it's not just you doing that workout that day..I'm doing the same one in my home!

So if you are READY to stop dabbling around and getting nowhere, if you are puffy, if you are unhappy with your appearance, if you are just looking for something that WORKS and somewhere where you can find all of the missing pieces to your puzzle, if you are looking for something that takes your time constraints into consideration...then please e-mail me (nik4213@gmail.com). I know, I know...you don't know me, it's weird emailing someone you don't know..but I swear to you I'm the most easy-going person you will ever talk to, haha, and I truly want to give everyone the chance that I got this time last year. My life has changed DRAMATICALLY and it all started from just making a choice to try a challenge group. 

I hope to hear from you! And if not, have the happiest of holidays, whichever one you might celebrate, and nothing but the best for you in 2013!

Never Giving Up is Half the Battle

In life it is very easy to give up.  We give up on saving money, because we'd rather have what we "want". We give up on marriages, because they seem doomed and like there is no light at the end of the tunnel. We give up on our goals and our dreams because the road that leads us to them seems about as difficult as trying to climb Mt. Everest without climbing gear.

It is so easy to give up.

I always take notice when people refuse to give up. On my way home from work there is a donation station for charitable items. This is a rinky dink place that just opened up and from what I can tell, business is slow. Yet this man sits outside on a bench every-damn-day holding a sign saying "Clothing Donations Being Accepted Now". People just pass him by, or stare at him out of their car windows as they sit at the stop light (myself included). Some people, I'm sure, don't even realize that he is there. But he is there, every day. Every day he sits and he smiles and waits patiently for that one car to pull into the parking lot and make a donation. I have decided that tomorrow I am going to be that person. My couple bags of clothes and old board games might not be much, but it might be that small sparkle of hope that man needs in order to continue to sit and work for something that he has a true passion for. He wants to help others and he won't give up. No matter how many days go by that he gets no one, that day when he gets someone to donate makes all of those days worth it.

My mother is very similar to this man in her journey to spread the word of the Lord through being very active and dedicated to our church. Our church is EXTREMELY small; like 10 pews on each side small and has lost the majority of its funding. Weekly contributions sometimes do not break $300 and attendance is down. Attendance is so bad that we do not young adults to lead the procession of 3 choir members down the aisle or to light the alter candles. Funding is so low that we do not have a Pastor; instead, the church comes together and each person takes a turn preaching each week. And those that attend regularly, continue to attend. The church refuses to allow itself to give up, and it presses on as a church family week after week. My mother was the one chosen to preach on Sunday. Ironically enough she told the story of Hannah, a woman who could not conceive a child but that never lost her faith in Jesus and never gave up. Eventually, Jesus awarded Hannah a child. The message behind the reading was that we should not give up on things that we are passionate about, and that in time our goals will become realities.  Now, this amount of time might be very, very long or it could come with a stroke of luck. Either way, dedication remains the key to success.

Now, imagine if you lived your life with that kind of mentality day in and day out. It sounds draining, yet rewarding. If we never gave up on ourselves, imagine the things that we could accomplish.

Take ACTION!

Was there ever something going on in your life that you just HATED? I mean you really HATED it to the point where it completely consumed your thoughts, time, emotion, etc.? Even when it wasn't present, it felt like it was there!!!  It's like a visit from "that" family member..the one that just won't freaking leave!

UGH!

You ever just want to scream?

I know I do.

Sure, this blog is about motivation, inspiration, being positive, etc. but let's face it-even the most positive of people have a day where they just throw up their hands and say, "THAT'S IT! DONE FOR THE DAY!"  We all have those days.

I'm currently going through one of these situations myself, and I have been complaining, whining, crying, bitching, moaning, and groaning about it for quite some time. I allow it to consume all emotion from me on some days, and carry it home with me on others. Yesterday, I decided to practice what I preach to others and do something about it.

In reading Anthony Robbins's book Awaken the Giant Within the other day on the treadmill, I came across a quote that ignited this little spark inside of me (which, sparks grow into flames, flames grow into fires, fires grow into infernos, etc.) The quote said, "It is not where you start out, but the decisions that you make about where you're determined to end up that matter." Isn't that the truth? Think of all of the decisions you have made in your life: where to go to college, whether to stay in school, who to date, who to marry, who to divorce, whether or not to have kids, which job to accept and how each of those have affected your life. It is crazy to think of the web that we weave for ourselves throughout our lifetime.

Now, in the same regard think of the other decisions that you make in regard to your emotions. Feeling angry, feeling depressed, sad, upset, etc. etc. and think of the web that those weave: You get mad so you yell at the dog, stomp around the house, your significant other is afraid to come near you, you take it to work, have a negative attitude surrounding your tasks, vent to your best friend, bring them down, they go yell at their dog and husband, etc. etc. Every decision we make spins its own web; some webs are positive, and others are negative. The funny thing is those negative webs seem to grow at a lot faster rate than the positive webs do!

I realized yesterday that I had this HUGE negative web branching out from me right now, and that is NOT something that I want anymore. The book also says that, "you have to set standards for what you consider to be acceptable behavior for yourself, and decide what you should expect from those you care about. If you don't set a baseline standard for what you'll accept in your life, you'll find it's easy to slip into behaviors and attitudes or a quality of life that is far below what you deserve." I realized that this negative thing in my life was literally controlling my life at this point. Tony says that we must TAKE ACTION, and sometimes we must take a massive amount to get what we want out of life. So, rather than sitting around bitching, moaning, and complaining (which I did sound off one last time last night) I decided that I was going to start taking action toward breaking down this negative web. The longer I let it go,the bigger it was going to get, the more work it would be to get rid of it.

So I started baby steps. I started taking that action toward something new in my life. I started exploring options, weighing pros and cons, and the funny thing is that every "con" that used to fuel my self-doubt got washed away when I set my standards for what was acceptable. Every "con" that made me afraid to make this move quickly vanished, because in the end it's not the money that's going to matter it's your sanity and at this point I'm about ready to be checked into a nut house :) It's time to move on (yes, I'm talking about my job).

So think about it. What in your life needs a change? What in your life is the center of this negative web (because we all have one somewhere). Take one step today toward changing it. Use the energy you would typically use to complain about it, and put it into a positive action to begin changing it.

If you are having similar problems in your life, I highly recommend you pick up Anthony Robbins book Awaken the Giant Within. I read a little bit every day and it is helping me find a voice and find the courage that I need to make my life what I want it to be.

Imagine the Possibilities

So, I had this random idea the other day that I started to employ in my own life just because it is something I am passionate about, but I felt like sharing it might help the idea to spread and thus benefit more people.

I love to help people. One of the most frustrating things for me is when I can't.  I love to motivate others towards their goals, and realize that their dreams can become a reality. I feel like one of the most wasted things in life is a person's own idea of their self worth. There are so many out there that do not have a support system.

The other day I went out onto some random Facebook group pages and poked around. I participated in the posts, because I wouldn't be on the pages if I didn't have an interest in what they were for, but then I went a step further. I read other people's posts. See, here's the funny thing: this keyboard and this monitor are a safety zone for so many people. Did you ever meet someone who could talk the biggest game over the computer but then didn't have the guts to say something to your face? The same can go for people sharing their goals and their dreams. Some people feel that an online community may be the only place they can go to let these things out.

So I looked for people going through milestones in their life, or struggles, or that were trying something new. I read through a LOT of posts, and chose three of them that I felt I could relate most to. I phyiscally messaged those people a very short "Congrats" "wishing you luck" "I have been there! You are going to do great!"...something along those lines.  I started by telling them that this message was probably random, but that I had been in a similar situation before, you will get through, you will accomplish this, etc etc...if you ever want to talk *insert topic here* feel free to message me back; if not I hope you have a great day and good luck!  The message was nothing detailed, it was nothing creepy. It was an honest well wish from my heart.

I actually got a message back. The girl had stated that my message made her day and that she didn't have much in the way of a support system for what she was doing (which was running her first 5K). Honestly, I wasn't expecting ANYONE to message me back, but it made me feel good that someone could RETURN the kind words. I don't think that happens enough.

So I got to thinking...if I did 3 people a day that would mean that I could positively influence 21 people a week; roughly 90 per month...1080 per year. Wow.

Imagine if other people had this mentality of just influencing 1 or 2 people per day...and you weren't looking for kind words back because all your end goal is, is to spread something positive rather than negative. Can you imagine the profound impact that could have?
I always say that you never know what another person is going through - even if they are always smiling. And you never know who is facing a struggle and just WISHING that someone would notice their hard work...imagine if you were that person. That little shining beacon of light that just randomly popped into their world and said, "Hey...you don't know me...but I believe in you...and you're going to do great."  It's like a random act of kindness but this is more: this could turn a person's day, outlook, even potentially life if it is an extreme enough case, around.

I know not everyone will agree with this post, and I don't expect you to. All I'm saying is to imagine the possibilities. How many times do we haphazardly flip somone the bird while driving, or mutter hurtful words under our breath when someone cuts us off, or how many times do we participate in hurtful gossip just to lift ourselves up? We can spit out those hurtful words and gestures without even thinking about them..and in doing so we are spreading negativity. Then that person is mad and they pass their bad attitude off onto a co-worker who takes it home to his wife, who takes it out on their children, etc. Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration but many times something that evokes emotion in us turns into a chain reaction. All I'm saying is imagine if we focused on making that chain reaction a positive one.  Surround yourself with positive people and you will be come positive.  Once you do, reach out to others and "spread the wealth".